Devotion
A healthy art practice involves these 4 things:
It's intentional.
It's self focused.
It requires devotion.
It calls for honesty.
Last article, I talked about a very common pitfall of #2, being self-focused, and I summed it up with the very significant question, “If not now, then when is it appropriate for you to focus on your own development?”.
If giving substantial amounts of time, resources, and attention to what matters to you (and maybe only you) is a challenge then, like me, you probably had to confess that there would never be a time when external people or conditions declared that your time had finally come. It's true, you will probably never hear the words, “Ok, now it's your turn. It's time to focus on you.”
And let's face it, it's not any one else's job to speak those words to us…it's our job, and ours only. The fact that we need someone else to declare it shows that the devotion it's going to require to develop creatively will also need constant external affirmation.
So speak the words. In fact, tell yourself daily that it's time to focus on you. If you do, I'm betting you will come up against internal obstacles in the form of thoughts like these:
“Well, if I'm spending this amount of time and resources, it better result in something.”
or
“You've been doing this ___ weeks (or days, or years) and what have you got to show for it?”
or
"This better pay off or else I've just wasted ___________ (time, money, resources, fill in the blank).”
Sound familiar? Here's the thing: these thoughts aren't there by accident--they are a reflection of what we have learned since we were tiny people. And they are also an indication that we've got an unsustainable situation on our hands. Demands for results are eventually going to erode our foundation for a healthy art practice. Even the messages we get from the art world about devotion to practice have a bit of that ‘taskmaster’ attitude--just do it, no matter what, show up, do the work. These aren't bad messages, but again, I feel they miss the point.
You are creative. During your life, you have had the opportunity, whether big or small, to acknowledge in tangible ways this part of you: to nurture it, to get to know it, to be curious and ask questions, to explore, to think and ruminate, to be in wonder, and then express it.
If your creativity was a separate person you had a relationship with, what would be the quality or that relationship?
Is it one where there's trust or doubt?
Intimacy or estrangement?
Tenderness or coldness?
Care or carelessness?
Devotion or indifference?
Need I say more about what it could mean to have a devotion to your art practice? When I began thinking of my creativity as, perhaps, not only the best part of me, but also the part that needed my protection and permission, everything changed.
What could your art practice look like with true devotion to your own development? What would it feel like to release the demands for producing something that ‘made it all worth it’? What if the devotion itself was what made it worth it?
All good questions worth spending some time with. I've been enjoying the stories you are sharing about your own art practice experience. If you would also like to share your story with me, just comment below and tell me about it.
